Grow up Peter Pan, Count Chocula. You shut your mouth when you're talking to me! How many times you gonna do this shit? You don't commit to a relative unless you're absolutely positive they have a pulse. Give me an up-to-date family tree. That was your mistake. You made me look like an idiot. Play like a champion! I hope you flip your bike over and knock your two front teeth out! You selfish son of a bitch! You leave me in the trenches taking grenades, John! Will you wait just a second? All I wanted is was a second alone with you so I could explain things.
But I've never gotten that chance. Maybe I don't deserve it, so here goes.
For longer than I care to remember, my business has been crashing weddings. I crashed weddings to meet girls. It was childish and it was juvenile. That's probably the best word to describe it. But you know what? It also led me to you, so it's hard for me to completely regret it.
And that person that you met back at your folks' place? That was really me. Maybe not my name, I'm John Beckwith by the way. But the feelings we felt; the jokes, the stupid laughs, that was all me. I crashed a funeral today.
It wasn't my idea, I was basically dragged to it. I went with Chazz who you forgot to tell me is totally insane. He also might be a genius because it actually does work, he's cleaning up. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. That's neither here nor there.
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Anyway, I saw this widow and she's a wreck. She has just lost the person she loved the most in this world and I realized we're all going to lose the people we love. That's the way it is, but not me. I just had my tits done.
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William doesn't give a shit about my tits. Cleary, this is pretty sudden Oh, you been playing "Cat and Mouse" with me ever since you came here. Call me "Kitty Kat". This feels "borderline" inappropriate. I said feel them! I'm sorry, Kitty Kat, are you out of your fucking mind? I'm not letting you out of this room until you feel them. Wow, they feel really nice.
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It's amazing what they can do Environmental is also a hunter. That's got to be an interesting combination. I hunt quail, Jeremy. They're overpopulated in this region and they're decimating the grubworm population. You got a fucking problem with that? Not nearly as much as I do with the attire that you have on, or just your general point of view towards everybody.
But let's go kill some birds. True love is the soul's recognition of its counterpoint in another. Tattoo on the lower back? Might as well be a bullseye. Do you know what that awareness is, Gloria?
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That we're all one. What are you doing? It's a game of touch football, every time I look over you're on your ass again. Does anyone know what this here is used for? Where'd you learn that? Yeah, we lost a lot of good men out there. I don't like to talk about it because we lost so many good men out there. We lost so many good men out there.
Playing with the Yankees?
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Yes, with the Yankees you loose good men to trades and unruly fans. Look I don't want to talk about it. Just a couple of kids who like to fuck, tryin' to make it honest, I get it How much jam you got, man? Listen man, the family dog lives downstairs. I can wake him up for you if you like. His name is Snooky. You could not be more wrong about what's happening here Just be gentle with her, OK?
She be pushing So is it just about the money? No no, it's about, uh, investing in companies that are ethically and morally defensible.
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Give me an example. Well, there's the company that we have where we're taking the, the fur or the wool from sheep and we turn it into thread for homeless people to sew. And then they make it into cloth, which they in turn sew, then um It's a pretty good deal. That's - that's very admirable. Although, don't make me out to be a saint just yet. We do turn a small profit. After all, someone has to pay for the, uh,. Lap dancers for the big guy here. It feels so good when he jokes.
I'm sorry I called you white trash. And I'm sorry I called you hillbilly. I don't even know what that means. Do you mind if I get married now? That brings us to the question of frequent flyer miles. Know what we're gonna do? We're gonna split them right down the middle. How would that be, Mr Kroeger? It would be not good at all. I earned those miles. Yeah, you earned them flying to Denver to meet your whore. She's not afraid to express herself sexually if that's what you mean. She's a stripper, for God's sake. Her name is Chastity. She is white trash, same as you.
Have you even shot one of these things before?